Monogamy has been the preferred form of relationship since the beginning of recorded time. In all cultures and religious sects, monogamy is the preferred form of relationship although polyamory has its place in some of the ancient cultures. That being said there is a gradual yet seismic shift towards ‘monogamish’ and this is starting to gain traction amongst the younger millennial generation.
Monogamy of course means being in a sexual or emotional relationship with just one person. Now of course there are a couple of caveats to this in that we can consider ourselves to be monogamous even if we divorce and then remarry or simply don’t marry at all but remain in a steady relationship or form an emotional attachment with a single person. The old stories of getting physical with another doesn’t count ‘because my other half and I are not married’ does not really give justification as the absence of a wedding ring is neither here nor there, however the focus of this piece is about the changing perception of relationships and whether society as a whole are gradually moving towards a more polyamorous type of relationship and moving away from over 2000 years of society practices.
In the modern world we place a great deal of importance on monogamy which, given that we are red blooded creatures, it a pretty difficult standard to expect. The whole point of monogamy was reinforced by religious groups as they felt it was a stable way to raise a family and keep the species going however today we live a very different type of lifestyle that that of our ancestors and the need to keep the species going is no longer an issue. The question that is starting to be considered is the fact that our lifestyles are so different to that of our ancestors, should our perceptions of accepted relationships not be changed too.
There are more and more open relations becoming common place today as we see both men and women not expect themselves and their partners to remain with a single sexual partner throughout their entire lives. Our lifespan is much longer than our ancestors so we have a great deal longer to enjoy different experiences at a different rate to that of society in the past. Indeed we are taking longer to ‘grow up’ simply because there is not the need to become so responsible so quick, as is the case of children who remain with their families and parents for much longer than they did just a few decades ago.
Society too also accepts different forms of partnerships that would never have been allowed in previous generations. Gay marriage and partnership with out marriage at all. All these would never have been contemplated in the past so why not Monogamish. This is where a committed partnership allow each other the odd physical indiscretion. They way this would work is when the couple are not on the same sexual cycle as each other. As we know there are times when one partner is active and the other is not so the odd encounter with someone else without any emotional connection would be acceptable and not considered cheating. The real problem with cheating as we know is the lies and secrets, if monogomish was accepted then this could be the answer to a great many problems in society! The fact that the physical act of sex has been so ingrained into our culture as an emotional state is where the problem lies. If the sexual act was seen for what it actually is, a physical release of endorphins and hormones and the link to emotional feelings were removed, then the acceptance of monogamish would be easier in general society. If one partner loses their job it doesn’t spell the end of a relationship and it has a far greater impact on continuing life as a couple so perhaps something for future generations to consider!